The Year of Grace: 2014 Wrap-Up

Woo, alright y'all here's 2014 in review :)

2014 Goals
Regain financial independence
Pay off credit card--not happening but it's down some
Pay car loan to below $8k (close!)
Altered clothes challenge
Run 15 miler for fun (close enough 14.5 trail jog on Oct 31)
Finally try surfing (Aug 30)
Go kayaking again (April 26, May 17, May 24, July 9, July 13, Oct 25)
Backpack in Olympic Forest (Hiked Sept 14)
Hike/trail run entire Wildwood Trail (1 day) (Mar 1st)
Roadtrip somewhere out of Oregon (ONP--Sept 14)
Potential:Run in official half marathon race (Dec 14) Sprint tri in summer

What a year it was...full of ups and downs, but truthfully if I had to put a "word" to last year...it was GRACE. Grace for myself, grace for others, recognizing grace all around, and doing my best to give more grace.

The year itself ended with about 922 miles covered via hiking, running, snowshoeing, and backpacking. I did only 6 Insanity DVDs and 5.5 yoga you-tube sessions to cross-train, but I covered about 20 miles via kayaking, tried surfing & snowboarding, and went on one SUP outing.

Of the miles via my own feet:
I met my goal to walk/hike the entire 30 miles of the Wildwood Trail in one day:

I ran in the Shamrock Run 15k and averaged 8:46 min miles:

I met my extra goal of running in a half-marathon race:

I had an epic back-to-back outdoor weekend early in the year that included a 16 mile hike in Tillamook Forest with an evening trip to the beach and followed up with a 8 mile snowshoe trip on the mountain the next day:

Tall D & I did some epic day hikes for mileage this summer, including completing as much of the Wilson River trail in one day as was possible at the time, partially fulfilling my goal of exploring Olympic National Park by driving & hiking around part of it, and backpacking in the Wallowas:

I made my longest solo day mileage by completing an epic 22 mile hike/trail run on Eagle Creek Trail this fall...and I smiled in the rain the whole way:

And I more or less made my goal of completing a 15 miler by defeating my personal challenge of making it around Hagg Lake:

I continued to be in love with kayaking and am looking forward to eventual future kayak/camping excursions:

I learned via completing my life goal of trying surfing that while it's fun to explore new options, sometimes it's satisfying to recognize that we already have so many good things going:

I accomplished my goal of a road trip out of Oregon in a round about way by taking the day trip to Olympic National Park in September and by the recent day trip to Seattle. While I think I originally meant for that goal to be farther distance.....it's all about grace :) and both day trips were rewarding!

This year I also spent the period of Lent in a social media time-out & allowed myself to finish processing and grieving my divorce and the loss that occurred to my world view in the years prior. It was a much-needed and well-received experience and I came out of Lent renewed and ready to move forward. In June, I finally "let go" on a trail in Tillamook Forest and headed into a new future. 

Ironically I also was involved with my ex twice this last year for short periods of time, but I re-learned hard lessons in the process...and eventually shut the door hard & firm. I was reminded that the core concept of self-respect needs to be forefront on my heart & mind...and I ended the year with my maiden name fully re-engraved in my heart and legally changed for good.

I participated in online dating on two different occasions. Spent the first part of the summer with a great guy. Continued to develop ideas for what I truly need in a partner and to be aware of whether or not I'm really ready to focus on a relationship. I completed the dating challenge my girlfriends gave me and truly enjoyed the process and the learning that came from it.

I had some random and scary health flukes in March & April that made me realize that my body was truly exhausted. It took 2-3 months to truly re-stabilize and I spent the rest of the year focusing on grace for my physical health & listening more to what my body actually needed. The fact that I ended with 922 miles out of the original 1000 mile goal that I had for the year, makes me incredibly happy that I was even able to come back this far. I've learned to not take my physical health for granted.

I made it through massage school. While it had to be slowed down and pushed back (grace!) and at times was a total test of my patience, on Christmas Eve my certificate of completion, final transcript, and alumni card were all delivered to my front door. Thank God it's over :) but I truly learned so much in the process.

In total the year had five housemates plus M's lil guy & visiting grandma. A recurring theme this year was also learning to put my foot down and learning to say no. Removing Housemate M from the home was a hard experience but proved to have incredibly positive outcomes. My current long-term housemate has been here for seven months now and we had two great short-term gals share space with us also. 

My financial goals are still in process but this is where grace comes into play once again. I don't doubt that those financial goals WILL be met in years to come...and I'm continuing to make headway...just not as fast as I already wanted. My car loan was almost paid to the goal and I have no doubts that I'll make the goal for this year ahead. The credit card is less than it was at the start of 2014 but there's still plenty of progress to be had. And while I'm not financially independent...I'm feeling a bit more "financially stable" than I have in a long, long time...and I can see that independence is on the 2 year horizon. 

I did however also more or less make it through 2014 completing my no buy clothing challenge. I stumbled with one unexpected Target trip but those two clearance items have been worn multiple times. I feel pretty good coming out of 2014 having only bought two new regular items of clothing.

The year also included more food preservation than ever before, wonderful moments of U-Picks, backyard growing, & kitchen canning. The suburban farm also grew to include a hodge podge of 4 chickens, the rebuilt arbor & coop, and a completed pallet-to-compost bin project. In terms of increasing sustainability, 2014 saw many advancements.

In the fall I emotionally fell on my butt for one primary reason, I had a near life-altering accident from which I walked away with no damage or injuries, and I hired my cousin to be my life coach to help hold me accountable toward refinding joy in my life and moving me toward goals. In less time than I could have ever imagined, I ended 2014 with an offer to get to Africa, fundraising ideas, steps for short-term professional development, the potential for a new dream career evolving...and a general sense of fulfillment.

So there we have it. I hiked, I ran, I finished school, kept kayaking. I made payments and continued sharing housing. I spent time with family and reconnect with my siblings. I enjoyed so many moments with the many amazing friends that I have in my social circle. I continued to teach. I changed my name and started chasing my dreams. I grieved, I exhausted, I rebuilt, and I ended the year.... happy, content, and satisfied.

I spent yesterday the final day of 2014 sleeping in, interviewing a new potential short-term housemate, and then I took an old college friend on a day hike to Tillamook Forest. This is someone I haven't seen in 12 years, who was given my number to reconnect, and who is in the process of a finalizing divorce that he isn't sure he actually wanted. To spend the final day of the year on trail with an old friend, seeing nature & exercise bring happiness to his face, and asking hard questions while offering advice....was probably the most perfect way to celebrate a year of growth, of grace, and of learning. 

The evening included a hot shower, a phone call to Granny, a Lara Croft movie marathon surround by the dogs & my cat, one glass of wine, and an early bed time just after midnight curled up cuddling my firework scared dog. Even though I had many other NYE offers, this low key night was the most appealing thing to end a pretty amazingly full year.

Hoping that your end to 2014 left you feeling just as solid. While I'm looking forward to this new year that we've entered into, I do so not with unrealistic expectations or hope, but with trust that the right and true opportunities will reveal...and that life will be enjoyed in all the many satisfying moments offered when we're not looking. Heading into this new year, I have no "word" for what the year might bring, but I hope it's one of restoration, trust, happiness, and many moments of slowing down. Africa is my focus, but I'm open to whatever God decides to reveal in the days, weeks, and months ahead....I mean come on He works and reveals in the most interesting of ways...so here's to just enjoying the ride ahead. :) Onward into 2015--love, peace, and joy to all of you!

Lil Simple (Past) Louisiana Moments

I mentioned yesterday that I've had many moments from Louisiana resurface in the last month or two and I don't know how much I was able to focus on or share those moments as they were happening, so I want to take the time to share some of them here. Many of the moments I did recognize were valuable and I've thought for a long time that given different circumstances, I actually think the full two years down there could have been much more enjoyable. It's fun exploring a new location and I truly wish that the time would have been as amazing as it could have been. Regardless there were some amazing moments that continue to stick out in my mind throughout the years.

Yesterday morning I was reminded of sweet tea & fried pickles....which made me remember this lil store/eatery on a small lakeshore where we went a few times when I first visited & moved down there. In that slow southern way, it took an hour for our food to be put on the table, but their pizza sauce was amazing and the sunsets that hit that side of the lake were absolutely gorgeous. The first time we went, we sat with a couple friends lounging in the water, played catch together, and enjoyed a few beers. It seriously was a perfectly simple spring afternoon & evening. The type that I hoped would be an example of the future.

This tree is an image that has always stuck in my mind and I can still feel the spring heat and buzzing. The tree itself was located at the nearest airport.

We used to make a drive to our favorite little spot to eat in Nachitoches about every other month or so. The drive there was windy and pretty empty but I loved to make it if only to get away for a little while. The restaurant we frequented at was small, with great outdoor patio seating, and the river a little bit away. I don't think I'll ever have as good of eggplant parmesean as I did at that location and the seasonal strawberry beer was equally amazing. The ex always ordered whatever was on special and I don't think he ever left disappointed. The town is known for its history, its food, and its Christmas light celebration. We took my aunt there the summer that granny fell and I also took a solo daytrip to explore the shops along its main avenue.

Honestly some of my favorite memories have to do with the consistency of my running, even if I now wish that I would have been at this current level so I could have embraced more of the trails that were straight out my door. But I have so many great memories of grabbing the dogs post work and heading out to log at least a few miles. One of the other husbands in the neighborhood (who he and his wife were dear friends) made a great running buddy and so he and I would head out on occasion, but my first ever 8 miler was an amazing evening jog through the trails with the ex and the dogs. I don't know that I'll ever forget the awesomeness of that particular run.

I honestly enjoyed the ability to watch the seasons change through our back windows:

The house had a great back patio for sitting, thinking, & watching the weather/seasons.

There was an evening a year or so after I'd been there, when I got to go into the training area to see the herd of wild horses. Literally hundreds of wild horses on an old dirt landing zone just operating in their normal, natural state...and the dogs unsure what to think. I finally got to see a little more of the behind the scenes of where and how the day-to-day work operations of the guys functioned also. The rest of that evening was equally simple and uplifting, just driving around in the truck through the woods. 

And while I didn't usually enjoy the moments of chaos with many of the local "friends," I really appreciated and enjoyed being able to participate in a true Louisiana crawfish boil. I love connecting to a places original culture.

Amazingly, this is the only hike I went on in the South but it was neat getting to explore some of the local flora and fauna, and I wish there would have been many more moments like this:

There were other great simple moments of day trips to the nearest lake to clear my head, the clothes line hanging in the garage or other "trying to stay green" moments, moments getting and enjoying the animals and the like, but the ones listed above were some of the happiest. In hindsight, I really did/do enjoy the little things more than the grander things usually. I had some amazing trips across the south during my time down there and I also have to say that I really loved the job that I had down there as well. I never thought I'd want to go back to New Orleans but in the last several months, I've realized that it'd be a different experience if I saw it my way and truly got to embrace more of the overall culture and history of the place. There's so much that was intended to see the time that Granny was to make it to NOLA and much of that I feel that I missed. So we'll see how the future pans out, but one of my gals and I are in talks about trying to make a low-key NOLA trip in our 5 year plan future :)

Little parts of Louisiana are still ingrained in me. I still relish the amazingness of Oregon in comparison, I still soak up the sun that we get and remember how nice those 80 degree December days felt, I still season salmon and eggs on occasion with Cajun flavoring, I still search for Abita beer at New Seasons, and I have taken to the occasional seafood boil. The experience of living there made me incredibly glad for what Oregon and other areas offer, but not without realizing that rural Louisiana did also have some of its own simple pleasures. Regardless of the downsides and what was lost in the process, I'm incredibly grateful for the exposure to another part of our nation, and I in no way doubt that those moments and memories will continue to shape me into the future.

2013 Review

Four months into 2014, but as I've been rereading posts from the year past I wanted to focus on the positives of 2013. Interesting to note that on New Year's 2013, I predicted that the year ahead would be full of challenges, while I already felt that 2014 was going to hold more of what I wanted for the future. So far, those words shared on that first day of last year, seem to be valid.

But in-between the up and down moments of 2013, there were some pretty amazing and phenomenal moments: TONS of outdoor trips, wonderful visits with some of my favorite out-of-state friends, restoring visits with Mom and Dad, finished projects, and a start to an additional life direction.

So without further ado and in no relevant order, the best of 2013:

An Amazing Week Long Summer Visit with my gal Christina:

Girls day hiking & celebration meals

Trying out kayaking again

Gaining comfort with biking

Getting to Be One of the Boys & Going White Water Rafting:

Finally checked white water rafting off the lifetime desire-to-do list and had a blast spending a few days at home on the water and getting to be one of the guys. A day hike and some camp antics, gorgeous drive views.

Overnight Backpacking Trips & Other Fun Times w/ Regular D:

Happy hours, sweating along trails, conversations over beers, simple moments full of smiles, sitting alongside each other on lake shores, enforcing that I learn to build a survivalist fire, float trip antics & car conversations, random they-were-going-to-throw-them-out flowers. This guy knows how to drive me absolutely crazy, supports and pushes me to regain myself, and is always bringing a smile. Not expected and not sure how long lived, but glad for our moments spent together as friends.

Simple enjoyable moments "Dating" the Ex & realizing its nonsustaining:

Hikes, a trail run, frisbee golf, the state fair, learning to paddleboard, brunch dates, movie rentals & pizza...simple, fun times together but always with that true connection, true honest communication, & trust just missing.

A Wonderful Mid-Summer Visit w/ Cait:

Loved, loved, loved spending an evening with one of my best gals. Sushi dinner, trips around the high lights of NW PDX, and laughter time w regular D's comic antics.

Outdoor Adventures & Friendship w/ Housemate M:

Last year I couldn't have asked for a better timed renter. Housemate M was a great outdoor companion and was oh so completely uplifting, helping me adjust to my single self and allowing me to gain comfortable in learning to give again to another. 

Springbreak Road Trip to the Redwoods & San Francisco:

Housemate M's first official road trip, camping in the Redwoods, visiting my two MPH girls and catching up with an old undergrad friend, walking across the Golden Gate Bridge w/ one of the most entertaining veterans, exploring Berkeley, and trail running thru Muir Park.

My Parents:

Honest to God, these two...they saw me through. Mom indulged my crazy while Dad's calmness always arrived in time to steady the boat and set the anchor in place. They came to help out in the yard and around the house, to set my foundation upright, and also let me care for them in return. The simple moments with them visiting for weekends were some of the greatest of the year.

Redoing the front yard, back yard/patio & house changes:

Honestly being tasked out by the landlords to work my vision on the front of the house truly gave me something to pour my creative energy into at the start of the summer. While simple, cheap decorative additions were made to the patios for the summer, they at least felt a bit more together for hosting get-togethers, and my home finally was organized and decorated to truly feel inspiring and a place of comfort.

Food Preserving & Summer Fun w Granny:

Last year saw the garden going, peaches/blueberry/apples/pears picked and preserved, and lots of other local food moments.

Started Massage School:

Brain got stimulated, my capacity for people widened, & life started heading in a new direction.

Made a Total of 800 Miles:

A mix of routine running, hiking, trail running, snowshoeing, and backpacking got us to cover 800 miles in the year of 2013--more than we would have ever expected. Regular exercise kept the dogs smiling and moods enhanced, new trails stimulated my mind and soul, and in the later part of the year I also added in a bit of yoga.

Other highlights not pictured: simple moments with family (happy hours, brunches & celebrations, summer Granny celebrations, and quality time with my cousin A), easy moments spent over food or coffee with dear local friends, and simple needed moments just relaxing in the back yard.

It may not have held everything I'd hoped but 2013 was a year of much growth, amazing outdoor opportunities, help with closing doors, and movement toward heading life in an complementary parallel new direction.

Best 12 of 2012

Time to focus on the highlights and good moments of 2012 rather than all the doom and gloom :)

So in no particular order, here are some of the best moments/items of 2012:

12) Visiting my gal Christina in San Antonio. The trip was incredibly insightful, I fell in love with the city, and it was great to be back in the south. C and I had a great time exploring San Antonio & Austin together, catching up, and helping to push each other toward better versions of ourselves. The trip also marked the reality for the separation to occur.

11) Tall D's and my two day backpacking trip this summer. Sweat, hard work, togetherness, gentleness, happy dog faces, awesome camp spot, major inclines, sore feet, a stint on the PCT, and testing out my own backpack.

10) Roadtrip to Arizona with Brook to see our other high school best gal Caitlin. Saving gas by driving the Prius, seeing the Vegas strip at night, soaking up the dry southern heat, good quality time with two of my favorite gals, hunting down the vortexes and getting Brook to the Grand Canyon. Definitely good times.

9) Savannah Trip: Surprise brunch for my 30th by my Georgian milspouse gals (Heather, Katie, Deir)---seriously was shocked they had arranged such a feat and it was so nice to have three of my favorite ladies in one spot. Equally wonderful was having Katie there for an extra day to explore, Deir's ongoing hospitality and getting my booty running again, and getting some quality moments with Ms Heather. Having dolphins swimming by less than 50ft away during the trip to the Atlantic at Tybee Island was pretty much a "once in a lifetime" moment as well!

8)  Day trip to Charleston, SC and finally getting to explore so much more of the history of the area.

7) Katie's trip out to Oregon in September. It was so great getting to share so much of this gorgeous state with her and to just spend some extra time catching up with one of my favorite milspouse gals. We also made it to one of the nation's highlights: Crater Lake and stopped by Mt Hood, neither of which I think I'd been to before!

6) Book club and extra moments with the gals. The trip to the beach, brewery nights, Saturday brunches in homes. These gals have gotten me through some rough moments, pushed me on, and created incredibly interesting conversations. Additionally the constant support and availability of T and my cousin A have brought me so much closer to them and have totally gotten me through some of the roughest of spots by helping me create and enjoy the simple moments of life.

5) Running. My number one stress coping strategy...and it proved to me that I can do so much more than I ever thought I'd be able to do. The first 5k race was a blast with Tall D. I enjoyed the 10k I completed with Sheila.....and I am so incredibly glad that I pulled out a 14 miler before the year was over!

4) New Years 2012---complete blast with a mix of both family and great friends. Couldn't have been any better honestly.

3) October trip home to spend time with D & J and to attend the Harvest Party. Had good visits with a host of friends.....and enjoyed the time in the comfort of Mom and Dad's home.

2) Refinding my mojo with teaching---feeling the passion that is present and recognizing how much I both love and am good at what I do.

1) Goal achievements and all the simple moments. Moments to focus on and feel fulfilled. Summiting Kings Mtn with the doggies, trying out kayakying, backpacking with T, relishing doggie faces in the rearview mirror of the Sorento, Sauvie Island beach days, selecting the "perfect" Xmas tree with cousin A, the recent soaking pool outing with T, happy hrs downtown.

The more I think on it, the more I can pinpoint so many special, simple moments. Even in the hardship, I still recognize that this year and my life have been incredibly blessed. And reflecting upon the last year, I re-recognize how much I have...and how many amazing experiences I was able to enjoy.

Interestingly, here's the recap from 2011.

What are some of your best moments from 2012?